The Spirit Stirred

...And the spirit of the Lord began to stir him
-Judges 13:25

...The Spirit of the Lord will come upon you in power, and you will prophesy with them; and you will be changed into a different person. Once these signs are fulfilled, do whatever your hand finds to do, for God is with you.
_1 Samuel 10:6-9

These verses really spoke to me today. I have struggled with my view of the Holy Spirit for years. As a matter of fact when I made a personal decision to commit my life to Christ over thirty years ago, I was really afraid to commit myself totally to being filled with the Holy Spirit. It was a conscious decision on my part. In the words of a beautiful song by Jars of Clay,
"I use one hand to pull closer
The other to push you away."
For the most part that decision was made because of fear of being changed. I didn't want people to think I was a fanatic about my faith. So over the years I have been able to compartmentalize my life. I have had a life of faith in which I followed Christ on my terms and in my own way. It has not been unfulfilling, but it has not been the rich deep experience I longed to have on a daily basis.
Recently I've learned something about myself and my relationship with Christ. This past September I began a Bible study on the book of Acts and I was invited to take an in depth look at the Holy Spirit. I discovered something interesting-that which I had feared was in reality what I desired. For in truth the Holy Spirit does change each and every person who commits themself to Christ. It is what He is designed to do. It is His work and His gift to us. The Holy Spirit transforms us to bring us into a deep, meaningful relationship. He transforms us to make us more like our Savior. Then like Paul and the other disciples we are called testify with a bold heart of the joy and love that comes from knowing Christ.
Today was our last day of the study, but in many ways it is the first day for me. I have been changed and I am free to embrace my faith knowing I can
.... do whatever (my) hand finds
to do, for God is with (me)